Really?!?!

I’ve been wondering whether I should write this post, because frankly, I’m a terrible writer.  As the people who know me in person, I’m a great story teller, but when it comes to expressing myself on “paper”, I suck.

I guess I’ve been lucky to have been blogging for 2.5 years without getting any nasty comments but that streak ended yesterday.  Here’s the comment that showed up:

Honey, I am not a thin person myself, but you have a serious problem.  Do you honestly believe you look GOOD?? No, you look like you are on a terminal diet of brownies.  Think about our spouse, if you have one, and your children. You won’t live much longer, so you are making them orphans and a widower.  Sew more and eat less, and go to the doctor.

There was an email attached (jecious@aol.com) but no URL.  I wonder if the email is even valid.

Really, “jecious”, do you think you’re being helpful?  Do you think telling a complete stranger to “sew more and eat less” is going to accomplish anything?  Here’s a clue: fat people already know they’re fat.  Here’s another one: being fat doesn’t automatically mean being unhealthy.  I see my doctor on a regular basis and guess what, my blood cholesterol is normal, my blood pressure is on the low side of normal.  Oh, and if the stats aren’t good enough, I walk my dogs 2 miles an average of 4-5X per week.  I shouldn’t have to justify my exsistance to a complete stranger, but evidently, you feel the need to pass judgement on a complete stranger.

The reality is that health is more important than being skinny.  Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes.  We, as women, should be supportive of each other.

I started this blog so I could share my sewing projects.  Nothing more, nothing less.  I don’t share personal info here because a blog isn’t a good way to really get to know someone.  All you know is what the writer chooses to share with you.  Honestly, I just want share my work and exchange sewing tips and reviews with other people who enjoy sewing.  I don’t care what your politics are, I don’t care what race you are, I don’t care what your sexual orientation is, I don’t care about your marital or financial status is.  I just care about what you sewed today and if it made you happy.  Our modern life has so much stress that sometimes we just need to share what makes us happy and sewing is what makes me happy.

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About andreahg

I'm a stay-at-home wife and mom to two boys, a cat and two rough collies. I love to sew and knit with vintage patterns, primarly from the WWII era.
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43 Responses to Really?!?!

  1. Missie says:

    Well said!

  2. Ruebyretro says:

    Good on ya 😀 What an ignorant comment!

  3. PepperReed says:

    What the What?!!?

    I follow your blog and Flickr. I’ve seen you various sizes… they’re all your own and are perfectly fine, because they are. FWIW, I think you look lovely and have great style.

    Oh and WORD that Fat doesn’t equal unhealthy and health is more than being skinny. You shouldn’t have to justify, but it’s never hurts to defend yourself and/or (try to) educate a rude idiot.

    Peace and keep up the good blog!

  4. Nancy H says:

    Andrea, you’re selling yourself short as a writer. Well and clearly expressed. Sorry you were the target of such unsolicited commentary; I always wonder what moves people to feel it’s appropriate to offer their opinions in this way. Whatever it is, I don’t think it’s the unselfish concern for others that they claim—perhaps it’s easier to find fault with others than to look at what may need changing in their own lives. Keep sharing the beautiful clothes you make; I don’t comment often, but I always like reading your blog for inspiration.

  5. Heather says:

    Maybe you should stop eating altogether, and smoke cigarettes an pop diet pills instead. THEN you’ll be HEALTHY.

  6. lap says:

    I’m so sorry someone insulted you. I think you look great in your handmade garments, because you fit them to the shape that you are, and they flatter you because of that. Shame on that person who chose to poop on our parade.

  7. Viv says:

    This is a well-written response to someone that doesn’t deserve one, and I’m glad you posted it.

    And let’s not forget the fact that you eat healthier than anyone else I know. Size is not a perfect indicator of health, but it seems some folks haven’t figured that out yet.

    Keep kicking ass, as only you can.

  8. Sarah says:

    I agree, that was a great response to someone who didn’t deserve any recognition at all. I’ve never understood what makes people do these hit-and-run comments on blogs — I’ve only gotten a few truly hateful ones over the years but it seems like everyone gets them sooner or later. IGNORE AND CARRY ON!

  9. Rita says:

    I am so sorry that this comment was made to you. Rude people who feel they have the right to voice what THEY think unfortunately abound and it seems to happen more often when there is the safety of the internet to make these types of comments.

    Just keep on sewing!

  10. Pia says:

    Second all the comments above, and would like to add that I think you look great and I am seriously envious of your fantastic wardrobe. There will always be nasty and ignorant people around, let us not allow them to make us think any less of ourselves. Keep up the posts, looking forward to seeing much more of your lovely pieces. You’re an inspiration, you are. 🙂

  11. Janice says:

    I’ve been reading your blog for awhile now but I rarely comment. It’s awesome that you want to share your sewing with the rest of us who love to sew as well.

    The world is full of tons of rude people who feel that they can say whatever they want since they’re hiding behind a keyboard in the virtual shell of anonymity online. That comment is more of a reflection of their ignorance and cowardice than of you in general. Just let it roll off your back. Explaining your personal health here and making a reference to that will just give that commenter what they want — the power to hurt you and make you react.

    Your blog is awesome and is a tremendous source of fashion and sewing inspiration. I hope what happened doesn’t deter you from posting your sewing creations here. 🙂

  12. Susan says:

    I think you are an outrageously attractive woman who makes body-conscious, well-fitting clothing. I love reading what you do, and I’ve shared your blog so others can appreciate it too. Don’t let one small-minded person get you down!

  13. Cynthia Allen says:

    Well written! You are a beautiful girl, with lovely taste in clothing. Who cares what one ignorant individual thinks!

  14. K-Line says:

    What a hurtful comment! So sorry you have had to go through this. Maybe it will take the sting out slightly to know that (crazily) it seems to be that the more popular you are, the more likely you are to find these occasional miserable commenters? You are a stylish woman, a talented sewist and a great blogger. So press delete on that hater and show us your next outfit 🙂

  15. Jen says:

    You responded with a great deal of class, when the remark that inspired this didn’t even deserve one in the first place. But some people simply have no sense at all. I think you’re beautiful and cute, and I LOVE coming here to see what you’ve made (though I rarely, if ever comment).

    Why people these days think it is acceptable to say or write things like that is beyond me. Yeesh.

  16. Annelouise says:

    I love the retro vibe of your clothes, you look sooo stylish, after all what’s the point of hiding in trackies and a humongous t-shirt, they don’t fool anyone into thinking a small person is inside the large clothes. Your fitted look is classy and celebrates who you are. A person with fabulous taste and sewing talent to make it happen.

  17. Cathi says:

    Honey, you write wonderfully and you don’t just look good… you look GREAT!
    And I think “jecious” didn’t quite spell her name right – it’s spelled “jealous”, she got a couple of letters wrong.
    Poor girl, she’s a twit *and* she can’t spell, we should all feel sorry for her.
    Keep sewing and keep inspiring!

  18. Sølvi says:

    Geez- what a looser! You have one of the most impressive vintage- style wardrobes I know, and this person obviously don´t know ANYTHING about sewing and style. Keep up your great work, I for one love to see the inspiring outfits you put together! 🙂

  19. Kim Campbell says:

    Another wonderful post by someone who just doesn’t get it. You are beautiful and I adore how you make your clothes. I’d rather be my full figure self than the sickly looking thing I was in 1997 after my divorce. NOTHING looked good on me.

  20. Karen in VA says:

    Your response was right on. I read your blog precisely because I’m a larger woman, back to sewing after a 30 year break, love vintage and can’t wait to see what you’ve made. Your outfits are beautifully made, fit well and inspire many of us. Please keep on sewing and blogging!!!

    Karen
    PS I’m also a DC metro resident…

  21. Psycho Sue says:

    RIGHT ON SISTA!!!!! Haters Gonna HATE!

  22. sewvintage says:

    Don’t give too much on comments like that, there are people out there who take on insulting people in forums and blogs as a hobby.
    You’re reply was precisely to the point.
    I love your blog and I think you look good the way you are. I am plus size myself and sewing vintage and your blog is one of my sources of inspiration and motivation to just go for my style and feel confident about it. You have also inspired me to post more pictures on my blog of the garments I make with me actually wearing them instead of just draping them over the dress from.
    Keep on the good work, you totally rock!

  23. Susan says:

    What a nasty little person! She must have very little in her own life, to feel the need to attack you!

    You look FABULOUS! Just keep doing what you do.

  24. NancyDaQ says:

    And yesterday, one of my friends received a post with the dreaded line, “she needs to eat a sandwich.” Honestly, what gives with people. I think people need to stop on both sides of the fat/skinny commentary. It’s rude and does no one any good.

    BTW you don’t have to justify yourself to anyone who posts rude comments like that. Their concern is not about helping you–it’s about scoring points. What a loser.

  25. Charmion Stephens says:

    Andrea, I linked to this post from another favorite site of mine. All I can say is “You GO girl” and don’t let this pathetic little person with his/her nasty comments get you down! I can see he/she didn’t get you down ant that is good! Personally, I love the pic. Hugs, Charmion

  26. alison says:

    You are beautiful both inside and out, and your wardrobe is magnificent. Sorry that some nasty stupid person didn’t think so, but that is their problem. I read your blog often, but don’t usually comment. I find your fashion sense, and joy to be inspiring. Best wishes and a happy holiday season…

  27. Shannon says:

    Wow! I cannot believe what some people deem is acceptable by today’s standards. Unfortunately, we live in a rude and overwhelmingly stupid society. Obviously, you have a commenter that fits the bill on both counts. I know how much it stings when someone attacks you personally, but try not to dwell. You are a strong, beautiful woman that has many admirers.

    So, just repeat after me, “Bite me, jecious.”

  28. Claudine says:

    I am a thin person myself and I honestly believe you look GOOD.

  29. sdBev says:

    I’d love to give you a big hug as well as a thunderous round of applause. Unfortunately I’ve run into just such people in real life. People who feel entitled to belittle me for no other reason than they “think” I should do better. I have found the perfect response. In person I absolutely gush with enthusiasm and say” Thank you so very much. I hope your day is as wonderful as you’ve made mine.”

    BTW you have a fabulously inspiring blog. Especially since you think you can’t write.

  30. sdBev says:

    I just read what I posted. I do hope that the “especially since…” was not offensive. I didn’t mean it negatively at all. I meant to sincerely say, this is a great blog. I enjoy reading about your sewing adventures.

  31. Heather K says:

    You have inspired me to start sewing again and enjoy what I make, and stop waiting until my weight reaches some arbitrary number. Thank you very much and I hope writing your post helped you to let it go.

  32. laura lake says:

    You know, the last time I saw an old acquainte who had lost a lot of weight, it was because she had cancer. I’ll just stay the size I am, thank you very much, and be careful what I wish for. You look great, ad I have serious wardrobe envy!

  33. Fenice says:

    Ne prêtez aucune importance aux propos de cette personne !
    J’ai découvert votre blog il y a peu et, depuis, je viens régulièrement voir ce que vous faites.
    J’aime votre belle énergie, votre entrain, vos idées foisonnantes… tout ce qui fait votre personnalité remarquable et qui est pour moi une grande source d’inspiration.
    Ne changez rien, restez telle que vous êtes vous êtes tout à fait charmante.
    A bientôt pour de nouvelles aventures “couture”
    ps: pardonnez-moi, je lis bien mieux l’anglais que je ne l’écris.

    • Suzanne Schneider says:

      (translation)
      Don’t take any notice of things by this person!
      I discovered your blog recently, since, I return regularly to see what you have made.
      I love your beautiful energy, your thoughts, your creative(?) ideas…all that makes your personality remarkable and that is for me a great source of inspiration.
      Change nothing, stay just as you are , your are totally charming.
      Thank you for the new adventures in “couture”.
      ps: excuse me, I read better English than I write.

      (I hope I have captured the translation correctly, Andrea. Using the word “couture” to describe your clothing is extremely high praise AND warranted. Take heart and forge on!)

  34. aliann says:

    Oh my gosh, I just read the post on your blog. How rude that person is. I just viewed all of the pages on your blog this past week because I thought you looked fabulous. I couldn’t stop myself from looking at all the clothing you’ve created, not to mention your hairstyles! I love the retro looks. It didn’t matter to me if you were large, small, or somewhere in between. You definitely have a talent for “putting it all together” and I’ve gotten some great ideas from you.

    • Suzanne Schneider says:

      I agree! I have spent all morning and part of this afternoon reading and scanning your blog! It’s great 😉

  35. angie.a says:

    The haters must be on a roll this week, I rarely ever get a negative comment and I got a mean one yesterday. Maybe the season brings out the worst in the miserable?

    In any case, I have always found you and your blog to be very inspiring. You make beautiful clothing and I think you look fabulous.

  36. sharon says:

    I’m so sorry you received this nasty note. I find your blog inspiring and your writing style entertaining. I think you look beautiful and love seeing what you’ve sewn!

  37. Zenia says:

    I’ve been following your blog and Flickr page for a long time and always enjoy your style and your helpful tone. I think you look wonderful and you’ve given me a lot of style and sewing tips.

    It’s hard to not feel a bit wrecked when you’re insulted by a complete stranger with no warning. I’m glad you wrote the response that you did. I think a lot of people need to become more aware that healthy bodies look a lot of different ways. And confident bodies look even healthier.

    Keep up the good work.

  38. I think you are an amazing seamstress! Who cares what this person thinks!!

  39. Suzanne Schneider says:

    Andrea,

    A friend of mine has read your blog and suggests you write a book. She is an editor in Canada. Her area is different than what you create but she really appreciates the style and tone of your writing. Ever watch the movie “Julie & Julia”? It all started with a blog. I send you a big hug.

  40. Suzanne Schneider says:

    PS….do you ever sleep? I mean between the kids, hubby, dogs, house, etc? What vitamins are you on? I gotta get me some of those! 😉

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